Hindsight Thoughts: Belief System

What's up guys.

Welcome back to another episode of healing.

In hindsight, your no B.S source for thriving with

diabetes Taylor, Daniele here.

Hope you guys are having a good week, day, month.

We're heading into spring, which is really nice.

I think after the Texas freeze, I am looking forward

to slightly warmer weather.

Not.

Hot summer weather, just slightly warmer weather.

So it's nice to kind of see the sun a lot more and see things bloom.

So today I really wanted to talk about belief systems and

the reason why I wanted to.

Bring that up is because, over the past year with the pandemic and having to

pretty much be at home for majority of the year, it really called to question

what I believe in and what those beliefs do in terms of how they affect my

life, my goals and where I want to be.

And so it also really brought up, some thoughts and feelings around

my beliefs towards my health and how utilizing my beliefs.

Can drive me to the right goals or maybe even sometimes the wrong ones.

So I really want to dig into that today and just kind of talk through

how our belief systems can really be the heart of our resilience

and being able to push through, to meet the things that we want to do.

So let's get into it.

Beliefs.

I feel like we have to yeah.

Kind of start with just the raw definition.

And so, a belief is an acceptance that a statement is

true or that something exists.

And the other kind of definition that are found was, trust faith or confidence

in someone or something, which.

Makes a lot of sense, and it is understandable how we can have

so many beliefs because as we go through life, we witness things

that, suddenly become truth for us.

It's our reality.

And so that can be something that we believe in.

And the reason why I wanted to bring this up is because I feel like when

we think about the things that we feel or, trust that is something

that exists or someone it shapes how we move forward on certain goals.

So as I was doing a lot of deep inner work on myself and really trying to

pin down where a lot of the things that I feel about my body and my

health come from, I had to dig deep into what I believe and part of why I

think that it's important is because, your beliefs can push you forward.

And when you truly believe something, your actions follow.

So.

It's a mental discipline, if you will.

And often we allow our bodies to dictate so many things, from a hunger craving to

tired to pain, all these different things.

And.

It's oftentimes those feelings in our bodies that actually

drive what we choose to do next.

And so I found that mastering your mind really does open yourself up to

being able to do and push past those physical limitations if you will.

And so it's what makes your belief a reality.

And if I'm just going to have to pick an example, like if I believe that

I'm going to have, The business of my dreams with constant abundance

and it will happen as long as I believe in it and take action on it.

Right.

It doesn't mean that there won't be challenges or that what I

believe, won't have more weight, when it comes to resistance.

But essentially it is taking that thought and making it

reality through my own actions.

And so it really brings you to question of like, okay, What's more important.

What I'm feeling in my body right now, or what I believe, and don't get me wrong,

there's definitely a fine balance between listening to your body and knowing when

it's like a signal for, Hey, I truly need rest, or I just don't feel like doing it.

But it still is to me, a good indicator of how we can push past something.

So I'll just take exercise for example.

I, I do believe that exercising will help me reach my goals.

And it is oftentimes my bigger belief that if I exercise, I won't see results

that actually keeps me laying in the bed.

That if I go to the gym that everybody's watching me and everybody

is, going to come by and correct me if I'm doing something wrong.

I recognize that I believe that more than I believe that going to the

gym is just naturally good for me.

And I seen that through my actions of how many times I've been to the gym.

And thinking through the insecure thoughts that kind of plagued my mind at times.

When it comes to that when I'm laying in bed and it's early in the morning

and I've reserved my mornings to be able to do those types of things

and I'm laying there, I'm like, Oh, but sleep feel so much better.

Sleep feels so much better.

And it's kind of like this repetitive mantra that I'm playing in my head

that soon convinces me that, sleep is better and going to the gym.

Isn't I believe that sleep was more important than the gym.

And so I took action on it by.

Going to sleep or back to sleep.

So it's, it's such an interesting, psychological thing that we go

through when we really start to think about everything that we believe.

I think we often try to look at the positive beliefs and then the negative

beliefs kind of just stay by the wayside.

We try not to acknowledge them because by acknowledging them, it shows that

we are playing a role in our own.

Progress not to say that there aren't outside things that, caused trouble, but

initially it boils down to what you value.

What do you choose to do?

And.

I hear that a lot of times.

And I've seen people who are just so burnt out and they feel so

defeated by, someone else that says, well, you just gotta do it.

You just got to get up and you just gotta do it.

And you just gotta, make sure that you want this bad enough.

And a lot of times people really do want it bad enough, but they're

internally paralyzed because they don't understand what those negative

beliefs are that are holding them back.

And so I've found that by working.

Through my subconscious beliefs, the things that, I don't realize I pack away

and allow to kind of work through me unknowingly and that addressing some of

the insecurities that I have around some of those beliefs that I'm actually able

to make the right decisions at the moment.

So I'll use this morning, for example.

I actually woke up on time at D's restroom and it was right, like maybe nine or

10 minutes before my alarm went off.

Mind you, my alarm goes off at 5:00 AM.

And so I use the restroom and then I go and I climb back into bed

instead of staying and doing, getting starting to get ready, starting

to Put on my workout clothes and get ready to go drive to the gym.

Instead I get back in bed because it's almost habit because I usually get

up in the middle of the night anyway.

So I didn't realize it.

It was almost getting ready to be 5:00 AM until after I got in the bed.

And I looked at my phone.

But even still, I started to feel sleep hit me again.

And it was in that moment that I had about five to 10 seconds to really

decide if I was going to get up or not.

Now I will say I'd been staying up pretty late over the last couple of weeks.

So am I asleep patterns have been really off because I tend to fight my body in

the evenings when I feel myself getting tired and instead of winding down and

going to bed so I can get up at 5:00 AM.

I usually push past it to edit that one last thing or do this one more thing.

Instead of finishing, I'm still working on it.

I'm not perfect.

Okay.

So I ended up falling back asleep for a little bit and I have.

I got quite, yes, I do.

I'm that person that has like five alarms back to back that are, five minutes

apart and they each are labeled something like, no, I really need you to get up.

Now.

I like to give myself grace in the mornings simply because I know sometimes

5:00 AM is just unrealistic for me.

So I allow myself to go back to sleep.

And then I'll wake up again around seven 30 and that's when I truly got

up and started kind of moving around.

And I decided right then and there, because I knew that getting some

form of movement in, in the mornings is really beneficial for me.

Every time that I work out or do something that just gets my blood

flowing in the mornings, my days.

Go so much smoother.

I know that to be true.

That is my belief because I've done it so many times and every

single time, my days have always just kind of fallen into place.

So I instead because I didn't drive to the gym, I did 15 minutes of yoga.

I love the down dog app and that really.

No, I did like 20 minutes actually.

Yeah.

About 15, 20 minutes of yoga.

Just really good deep floor stretches.

I like it because you can customize what type of, session that you want to have.

And so, I've been dealing with my shoulder.

I've got frozen shoulder.

If you don't know what that is, look it up.

It's not fun.

And it is a diabetic thing.

But so my shoulder has been really difficult to move lately.

And so I was.

Wanting to do something gentle, but involved a lot of stretching

to help kind of, get some rehabilitation in the shoulder.

So.

I did that.

And after I did it, it didn't feel like I lost a lot of time.

Which sometimes is something that comes up when we burn out

when trying to be consistent with our health is I don't have time.

And I decided I wasn't going to work against that.

I couldn't spend an hour working out because I chose to sleep in a little bit

more, but I could give 10 to 15 what, 20 minutes to kind of stretch things

out and that's better than nothing.

And so I did it.

I felt really good afterwards.

And then that just like snowballed into getting ready for the day,

starting work and feeling good.

I ended up, making sure I had a good breakfast and actually sat

down with no distractions and just ate and enjoyed my breakfast and

then started answering emails.

So it's one of those things where.

It does take some work.

And, we tend to beat ourselves up whenever a belief system that we have

gets trumped by a stronger belief system that sometimes is rooted in a lot of

deep inner work that we, should explore.

But I think in knowing this, there there's definitely ways that.

These belief systems can help.

When we do this type of inner work, oftentimes our beliefs are

defined by our families, society, or experiences and those influences

can be hurtful and helpful.

And it's up to us to choose which one we believe and continue

reiterating that into our lives.

So that way, the cycle can Really turned into a habit.

That's kind of the best way that I can see it.

So, one thing that I realized that I was telling myself which I didn't realize

that it was an unconscious belief, is that I'll pick on my partner is that,

I don't understand why he is physically attracted to me outside of Memphis.

Cause I know the face is flawless.

I do, I do.

I'm I have no problem believing that I'm from a faith standpoint, beautiful in

that sense, but with my insecurities, with my physical shape and him being so

ripped and defined and muscular, there are times where I'm like, I don't fit.

I don't the picture doesn't make sense, shoulders up.

Sure.

But from, from, shoulders down, I, my body type doesn't seem to flow with

his, and it really started to make me think about all of the imagery that we

consume about what is an ideal couple physically and how often we like, Oh, I

wouldn't put them two together because we tend to match like likeness and

aesthetics when it comes to people dating.

And so.

When I really started to think about that.

I started looking at the, all the imagery that I was consuming.

I remember we were talking texting back and forth about something

and it's when I was in one of my upswings of like, yeah, workout.

And I want to get to a point where I can work out with you because

I, I ha I'm really weird about working out with guys that I date.

I feel really weird and because he is more advanced in the workout realm,

he really could be a personal coach if he chose to I get nervous and

I feel like I get really defensive and like, don't tell me what to do.

If my form is off, because sometimes I don't feel my form as often I can be,

I can be stubborn because I'm afraid.

And so I, would.

Get to this space where I'm like, I would love to be, be able to do like

acrobatic yoga with you, or like, you see those fitness couples where

they're doing these partner exercises and the guys like lifting girl up

and doing all these crazy things.

And so I remember sending him different pictures of, Aesthetics

that I would like for us to have.

I didn't realize that that's what it was.

I'm thinking, Oh, these are motivational images of the life

that I want to have with you.

What I really was doing is I was actually sending a, him and myself, a

subconscious belief that this is the visual that I think that we should have.

And it plagued on me because that started to lead more into

my insecurities of I don't fit.

This look.

And so I had to really bring that forward word and address that with myself.

And so it actually led to me doing a lot of inner shadow work.

It, it led to me like I ended up working with an intimacy coach to

really come full circle with being okay with my body as it is right now.

And so.

I ended up on following a bunch of accounts on Instagram.

I ended up changing the things that I looked at on Pinterest.

Cause Pinterest will suggest stuff.

And so if I'm looking at stuff that creates that same imagery,

it's going to keep suggesting it.

So yeah.

Why am I bringing that up?

Obviously there are some beliefs that kind of like define nature, but overall

what you believe and what you consume along with that belief is going to

be the inner driving force on how you take action on things in your life.

So for example, if Lowering your A1C, right?

I'm still in the midst of Lauren, my A1C, after that,

spike to 8.3 for my last round.

Right?

So when I reverse engineer, what that looks like for me, I realized that I

needed to understand what my levels are as much as possible insert my CGM.

Right.

This thing is the piece that I was missing to make sure I'm making

the right decisions about what.

I should or shouldn't be eating, which, I even hesitate to use that verbiage,

but I just couldn't really get an accurate understanding of how my food

is affecting me throughout the day, how my movement is affecting me throughout

out the day where my lack of movement is affecting me throughout the day.

And so even though I've met resistance and challenges, because

I believe that I can lower my A1C.

And that is something that is way more important to me than, anything

else we'll say for right now I did not stop until I got of CGM.

So what did that look like?

I started testing myself with my, strip neater way more often to kind

of prove like I'm having to burn through all of these strips, just

to kind of get an accurate read.

I started, reaching out to all different types of companies who will check your

insurance for you and all these things to see if I can order a CGM online.

There are some places I know this is more prevalent in Europe.

Where, as long as you have the money to buy a CGM, you can buy it.

But here in the States, insurance has to approve it.

You have to be a certain type of diabetic.

I tried to apply for a Dexcom, but because I'm not an insulin taking

diabetic, they would not approve me.

Insurance typically would rather you stick with just the standard glucose

meter that you prick your finger with because it's the cheapest thing.

And they don't really see why a CGM would be more valuable

than a regular glucose meter.

I think they got it backwards.

I think the glucose meter, strip meters should be, if you're off

medication or, you're doing really well.

And it's, it's really not necessary to have, a CGM to

really know where you're at.

24 seven for me though, since I've been uncontrolled for so long,

like I need to know, because I feel like my medication is doing okay.

I feel like my eating for the most part is okay, but I don't know what

things that I'm eating are spiking me.

Cause you know, everybody's body is different.

I realized, yes, I can tolerate moderate carbs.

I.

Can't do stuff like keto.

I can't go super heavy into fats.

It sends my numbers skyrocketing, and I really tried with keto.

I really did.

And I didn't advertise it very much because I do have friends who do

keto and it works great for them, but for me, it just seems something

that I needed to have for myself.

And every time that I tried to do it, I was having crazy numbers.

So.

Everybody's different.

But at the end of the day, I really want to lower my A1C.

And so I did everything that I could and eventually looked up with, my

dietician being able to get me a CGM and then getting my doctor to approve

for the prescription for a sensor.

And I've spent more time in range than I have probably in the last

two years now, again, I could have probably still been in decent range.

Now my A1C still reveals I wasn't, but even so, like, I understand that

my morning numbers might be spiking higher, but now I can look at,

okay, what was my numbers at night?

If I, if need be now with the freestyle Libra, which is what I

have you do have to keep scanning.

And that's something that, is a little bit different.

I feel like the Dexcom is one that's like constantly monitoring monitoring,

and that would be the ideal, but even so just knowing that I have it

and that I, at any point in time, I'll do it at any point in time.

I can just.

And I know where I'm at and I'm good.

Right.

So it's really cool to just be able to do that.

And I'm not having to prick my finger every five seconds

just to see where I'm at.

And it lets me know if I'm staying, even if I'm turning up or if I'm turning down.

So right now I'm at one 30, two.

And I'm staying even, and that's because I had breakfast about an hour ago.

So my expectation is that in another hour or so, I start to see that go down.

And if I don't, then I can evaluate what I ate to see.

Okay.

What within that might keep me, even, or is keeping me in

this higher numbered range.

Ideally, I'd like to drop down back to like the hun, a

hundred nineties, whatever.

So.

I having that has, it's been super helpful.

I really feel like diabetics should always have the choice to be able

to go straight to a CGM or not.

Or if they want to try a glucose meter first, I know it can be kind of scary.

But it's something that just, it's just so much more helpful to have.

And I really feel like the more information that we have, the

more we can make better choices.

So bringing it back around.

Your belief system, whether that be, positive or negative has a huge effect

on how you make choices for your health.

And so it's up to us to start to dig into what they are and

understand what they are and see.

Do I need to change this?

Do I need to adjust this?

Do I need to, kind of, look at.

Where did these things come from?

Why do I feel like I have to finish my food no matter where I'm at?

Oh, that's because, back when I was little, my mom would get really upset

if I did not clean my plate, even if I was full, like I had to finish all

the food that I got, stuff like that.

There's so many things that we don't realize are buried within us and our

experiences and our memories that are the driving force on how we operate

and deal with our bodies today.

Now I can go on a whole side tangent on.

The idea of just accepting your presence, self.

That's another episode for another day.

Maybe I'll do an ID live on it or something, but you know, it

starts with what we believe in.

It starts with how we think something is true about ourselves.

So if you believe that you are deserving of a healthy functioning body and that you

can really get ahead with your diagnosis.

And be able to do the things that you need to do to take care of yourself.

Then constantly remind yourself of that.

Surround yourself with visuals and mantras and affirmations

that play right into that belief.

And then you'll start to notice yourself taking actions.

And if you come up with something that resists that

belief, then dig deeper into it.

Understand why is it that I'm resistant to that?

Why is it that I am not able to really come to terms with that?

And I think you'll discover a lot.

So, hopefully that was helpful.

I think that it is really important to know what our makeup is, know what

makes us do what we do and and ends up creating this opportunity for us to be,

deeper and understanding with ourselves.

And that's the most important thing is that we love and

accept ourselves as we are.

And our belief systems can really help with that.

I hope today's episode was really helpful.

It's.

It's there's so much more that we could talk about with it.

Belief systems are such an interesting topic because the psychology behind how

our mind works, the things that we absorb and consume, internally and externally,

like it really does help to make up how we are and how we treat ourselves.

So.

Know, I just figured I'd share my thoughts on it and how it pertains to me.

And hopefully, you'll go home or as you're taking your walk, you'll start to

think about how your beliefs affect you and maybe start to shift those beliefs.

So that way they can better your health as well.

It really is our driving force and our North star.

Whenever we make decisions for our health and wellness and the more

that we can fine tune our beliefs to ensure that we are being the best

version of ourselves the better.

So thank you so much for watching.

Thank you so much for listening.

If you're not able to be at a screen to see my face I'll catch you guys next.

time

Coming up next time on healing and hindsight.

I think it's, it's really important to understand that

diabetes affects not only like what you eat and, your, your, how much

you use the restroom in different things, but also your mental health.

And for me it's important that I keep that at the forefront.

You know what I mean?

There's been times where I have been trying to run my Instagram.

And, and my business, and make sure that glucose gang has everything

that it needs as far as, what guests I'm booking for a live or coming up

with the sign and different things.

And there are times where I'll feel burnt out and I will have to mentally

step away from social media or mentally step away or recalibrate the things.

What am I watching?

You know what I mean?

Am I listening to something that might be a little bit more discouraging to me?

You know what I mean, am I, am I w what am I surrounded?

What am I taking in just as a whole, you know what I mean?