Defeating Your Inner Critic

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Hey, everybody.

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Welcome back to another episode of healing in hindsight, your no BS

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source for thriving with diabetes.

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You know, Me, Taylor, Daniele, and here for another hindsight,

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talks, hindsight thoughts.

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Both.

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And I'm pretty excited about this one, because I feel like this

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is relevant to anybody, not just diabetics, but non-diabetics alike and

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that is defeating our inner critic.

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And everybody has this, that little voice in your head that every time

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that you're getting ready to do something, try something, or even

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just waking up some times their mouth is running and kind of, yeah.

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Controlling your day, sometimes making you feel like you're undeserving, unworthy,

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and not able to achieve the things that you want, but here to say not true.

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And we're going to talk about ways that you can work with your inner critic,

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for your advantage, for your benefits.

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That way you can push forward into the goals and things that you want,

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whether it's pertaining to your body, whether it's pertaining to your

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diagnosis, whether it's pertaining to anything that you want to achieve.

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So.

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Before we get into that though, I do want to mention shameless plug.

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It is, my show.

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But I recently just launched my very first program called expedition.

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You journey to your best self.

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And this program is very near and dear to my heart because it is basically taking

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a lot of the things that I've learned and struggled with on how to achieve the

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body and the health that I want without losing time or motivation along the way.

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Y'all know, it's a busy life being a podcaster when you're trying to work.

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When you're trying to record, when you're trying to solidify guests, when

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you're trying to make sure that you're bringing in some money every day,

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whether that's through a full-time job or if you're like me and you decided to.

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Go in on your own, right?

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It is always a struggle and trying to fit in all of these different

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habits and things to ensure that your body is optimized to its

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absolute best can be a challenge.

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So if this sounds like you, please reach out to me on Instagram@healinginhindsight

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or @justtaylordaniele with one L and let me know what your thoughts are.

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Let me know how I can assist you.

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And.

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Might even have something special going on with my program, since it is brand new.

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And I'm bringing in founding members, so expedition you journey to your best self.

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Definitely hit me up if you want it on that, with that said let's do it.

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So your inner critic, it is, it is really interesting when I first came into the

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idea of, working with the things that.

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You feel like you struggle with and seeing it as an ally?

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My girl Lindsay, Simsek over at almost 30, did an episode on discipline and how

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discipline should be seen as an ally.

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And that really, I don't know, it really triggered something in me in

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a good way that opened me up to the idea of all of the things that we

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see as flaws or things that are bad.

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May just kind of be this dark and scary thing that.

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Actually isn't and it makes me think of that scene in marijuana.

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Spoiler alert, if you have not watched the movie where the Island

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goddess is this big volcanic monster.

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And once she received what was returned to her, then she goes back into this

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peaceful, calm, beautiful Island covered in greenery, all of these things.

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And so that's how I feel like our inner critics are now.

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Your inner critic can be anything.

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It can be anyone.

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We tend to put a visualization over this voice or thing in our head

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that is telling us that we're wrong.

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We're bad.

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We can't do anything right.

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You get it.

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So something that I like to do is just to, to name it, what is your inner critic?

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And for me, it is, it is myself.

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I am my worst critic.

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I know that, that seems to be a common cliche thing.

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But truly when I think about all of the things that I don't feel confident in,

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or when I feel like I'm hearing that voice, that's like, Hey, you probably

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shouldn't be doing this anyways.

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Whatever it is, truly myself.

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There used to be a point where I would hear my parents.

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There used to be a point where I would hear my friends but it really wasn't them.

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When I, when I really boiled down to it, I was making up the thoughts and the,

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sayings and putting their faces to it because it gave me somebody to blame.

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Now, I'm not saying that's the case for everybody.

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Sometimes your worst inner critic really is someone related to you or a friend.

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So I'm not saying that that can be a possibility, but at the core

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for me, I recognize that it was all of the things that I felt

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shame and guilt about for myself.

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And I would just put, different names and faces to it in order to somewhat make me

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feel better because then it felt good to like, no mom, no dad, no friend, whatever.

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You're wrong, but it's really myself.

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And it definitely changed how I talked to myself.

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Now, when it comes to dealing with your inner critic, once,

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once you kind of face that.

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I or whatever visual you have.

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Some people literally have some type of appearance.

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It's like this crazy weird looking monster thing.

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We have this visual of like, when something bad is going on in our

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minds, and we hear all of these negative thoughts it's coming from

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this, dark, visually unappealing thing that we've created in our minds.

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And a lot of times we don't want to face it.

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We see it in TV and movies all the time where.

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Someone is having some form of mental break, either in their dreams or whatever.

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And in order to face their fears, they have to go face.

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The thing that they're scared of.

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And usually it's in the form of something for me, it's spiders.

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But you know, something that you don't like a snake or whatever.

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And usually when they get to it and they defeat it, they slay the monster

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or whatever what's left is either.

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Acute and misunderstood version of it, right.

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Or sometimes themselves.

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And I like to think of the, the Kermit the frog meme, where you got Kermit at the

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mirror and then the one with the hood on.

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And they're like, yeah, just do it anyways.

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Like it's, it's that?

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And so the thing about facing your inner critic is it puts you in a place

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where not only are you able to recognize that it is not as scary as you think.

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But you're able to actually learn and understand why I feel like Animade

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does a really good job of these visualizations of like whenever something

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I think of bleaching when it comes to mind, whenever some, whenever spirit.

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Yeah.

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Turns into this monster thing.

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There's a core reason as to why it changed into this.

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And it's because it's this buildup of sorrow, of anger, of, longing

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of feeling like they didn't finish something and lift whatever, there's

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always this underlying theme that.

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Something evil that comes from something is a deep root of an unfulfilled desire of

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some sort or something, some emotion that didn't get expressed or, some vendetta of

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something that didn't get to be completed.

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And so I like to think of our inner critic as the same thing that when

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you start hearing those negative thoughts, that it's more so.

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Something deeper.

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That's going on, that's making you do this.

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And what I've kind of come to a realization for my inner critic

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is that it's kind of like my dogs innocence, that my inner critic

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is actually trying to protect me.

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It's not trying to harm me.

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It's not trying to make me feel like I'm less than, and that I don't deserve

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all of the things that I want in life.

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It is saying, Hey, Red flag.

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Don't go do not collect $200 caution tape.

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All the signs that say this is bad, don't do it.

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And sometimes whenever people that we care about, try to warn us about

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something, especially something that we feel very strongly about.

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We can have the tendency to be like, no, No, I think it'll be fine.

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And it's definitely a gamble of having to really dig into your intuition of like,

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should I continue forward or should I heed the advice of my support system?

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Right.

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And sometimes we.

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Continue to do it anyways.

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It's the same philosophy of dogs, and why they say, Hey, sometimes you need

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to do hand cues along with a verbal cue because they hear your voice all day long.

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So it's very easy for them to, not see or hear rather what

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you're trying to get them to do.

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But whenever you do a hands-on or you include a treat with something

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some type of actual thing, then they pay more closer attention.

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And so.

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It's kind of the same thing.

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Our inner critic is going off for all of these reasons and we have to

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have kind of a miniature discussion on, okay, why are you freaking out?

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Why are you warning me of this thing?

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And the reason why I bring up my dogs in particular is because

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it's kind of that thing, my dogs.

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And I don't know if anybody else has, does this.

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You can definitely let me know if they do, but they will bark and

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make noise for pretty much anything.

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If they hear a loud bang or a knock, then you know, they'll start barking

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or they'll start growling or making weird noises because they're just,

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all they know is they, I heard something strange and I don't know

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what it is cause I can't see it.

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I can't identify what it is.

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So I need to alert somebody.

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And for the most part, sure.

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It's helpful.

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Especially, I live by myself and so.

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When you're a female living loan, you don't have a guard system.

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I have an alarm thing on my house, but it's nice when my dogs, especially my

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oldest makes some noise of like, Hey, there's some movement outside the door.

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Don't know what it is, but going to alert you about it.

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Right.

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But it's the excessiveness of the warning.

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So she will bark and bark and bark and is kind of taught

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her a little brother the same.

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And when it's something like, Hey, It's my food delivery, right.

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Or it's my partner getting ready to come in the door or it's someone across the

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hall, I have a ring device and it's not even anybody coming towards the door,

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they just walked past it or they were, it's my neighbor, it's a false alarm.

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And it kind of creates this, little dog cried Wolf kind of set up.

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And so I have to train them that it's okay to alert me.

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But only if I say it's worth going off about, should you do it?

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And so now with some different training tactics, my dogs do not

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bark excessively at crazy noises.

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And sometimes it's yourself.

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Sometimes I've dropped something or I banged on something or I'm, thinking

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and I'm sitting at my desk editing and I'm like, start knocking or

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wrapping my fingers on, on the desk.

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And they think it's somebody at the door and it's not.

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And I have to literally yell at them.

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Like, it's me, it's me.

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Like.

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Stop freaking out.

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I'm the one who made the noise.

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And so I feel like our inner critic is the same thing.

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It's making all these alarms and saying all these things and we need

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to be the alpha in the situation, if you will and say, Hey, Hey,

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Hey, thanks for the heads up.

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Appreciate you.

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But a it's cool.

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Or B you know what?

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This is something I forgot about.

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Okay.

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We can proceed to, figure out ways to get around the situation.

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And so once you kind of recognize that it is simply your internal system,

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trying to warn you of something, then you're able to utilize that

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understanding to your advantage.

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So I will take, launching the show even launching my program

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that I mentioned earlier, that.

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There's all these things inside of me.

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That's like, Oh my God, freak out.

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This is insane.

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Like, this is going to be something major.

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This is, what if nobody signs up?

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What if nobody listens?

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What if nobody pays attention?

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What if nobody watches?

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What if nobody responds to your posts?

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No matter how many hashtags you put on them, because you follow all of these

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different strategies and all these things.

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What if the medication doesn't work, what if you can't lower your A1C?

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What if you are not able to, deal with changing your food and all this stuff

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like that, you just go into this spiral.

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Right?

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But in recognizing that it is simply your defense mechanism going on, you

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can say, Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey, slow down, slow down, slow down.

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What is it?

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What's what's really going on.

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Why are you reacting this way?

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And.

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Then you can actually have a dialogue with yourself and really understand, okay, my

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doctor put me on this new medication and I'm really nervous about it because it

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makes me feel like I'm not getting better.

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It makes me feel like I'm getting worse.

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It makes me feel like I'm not progressing.

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And that way you can really start to unpack those feelings.

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Hey, this is my first time launching a program.

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And even though I've trained so many people in the corporate setting to

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train people on something that is purely my own, it scares me because

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if people don't like it or it doesn't do what people want it to do.

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I'm afraid of the blow back when in reality, it's just it's okay.

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I've worked really hard to create something that I feel is powerful

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and the right people will come and the right people will go through it.

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And the right people will see the type of change that they

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want because I did it for myself.

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So we have to slow ourselves down and meet our emotions and our defense

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mechanism where it's at and ask.

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What's really going on.

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And how can we change this?

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How can we get to the root cause of this and say, it's going to be okay.

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Thank you for the warning.

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I got this.

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And I feel like the, the author's name is totally leaving my mind right now.

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So please forgive me.

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But the author of worry, wonder over worry, says it so beautifully.

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And I've been doing this exercise for a while and then, and of course are

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heard this on the almost 30 podcasts, but, in order to really drive it

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home, I feel like Lindsay's discipline episode really tied it all together.

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And.

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Well, the author in wonder over where he's basically, having you do, there's

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an exercise in the midst of the book, because she does a lot of journal prompts

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in that whenever you are feeling that anxiety, whenever your inner critic is

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starting to run its mouth and kind of go a little bit crazy write it all down, right.

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Or do some deep breathing and meditation, just ask, Hey, Hey,

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thank you for the heads up.

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What do you need from me?

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What is going on?

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That what is the deeper cause of this?

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And when I started doing those kinds of journal prompts of the things that

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I was scared of and things that I'm like, what if, what if, what if, what

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if, what if that's, when it really started to make sense that there's a

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part of me that just needed a bit of extra nurturing and extra reassurance?

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I feel like, Bernays, Brene Brown's work in shame and guilt and vulnerability

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is also something that's really great to think about, especially in the

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terms of the man in the arena speech And how, you kind of have to take

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off all this armor in order to move.

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I feel like 300 did a really good representation of that,

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where he's like kneeling and he's like putting his weapon down.

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And you think that he's giving up when in reality, the narrator tells

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you all the things that he had to do in order to get the perfect aim

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in order to take out his enemy.

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Right.

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And that's what your inner critic is doing.

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It is meeting to voice.

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What its concerns are and you needing to disarm it.

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So that way you can make precise decisions and take aim to knock out

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whatever the concern or fear is.

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So how do you work with this?

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How do you disarm it and now move forward with it?

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So once you've recognized what the concern is, and once you've disarmed all of

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the, what is the, I am scared, whatever.

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Then it's time to take action because if we sit too long, we'll

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start the cycle all over again.

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I definitely love the five second rule.

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I don't know if you guys are aware of it where like, instead of thinking through,

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if you should do something or not, you give yourself five seconds and you do it.

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And that is honestly helped me through so much.

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It is pushed me to put myself out there in ways that.

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I never thought I honestly would.

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From, Hey, any, does anybody want to share what these thoughts are?

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Right.

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And to, Hey let me just, I nervous about asking this person, if they

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would be willing to let me do this thing or be on their show or whatever.

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It is truly been helpful.

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Now I know sometimes people will do three seconds to I give myself

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five seconds, so that way I can have the extra two seconds to overthink.

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Because I think it's fair to allow yourself to kind of go

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down that path a little bit.

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You just have to limit that time.

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I always say, whenever something goes wrong or it doesn't go my way

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or it doesn't turn out how I would have hoped that I get 2.5 seconds

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to cry about it or flip out about it, freak out, be angry, whatever.

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And then after that, we got to get back to a regular scheduled program and

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come up with a plan to move forward.

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And so that's kind of what this is.

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So when you disarm, whatever it is, that's sounding the alarm.

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You have to take action and determine what that action is.

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So for example, I'm really freaked out about this medication

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that my doctor put me on.

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It makes me feel like I have, taking step backwards.

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It makes me feel like I'm not progressing.

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And that I'm a bad diabetic, right.

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When I understand that the root cause of that is I want to

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get better, but these changes.

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Feel like they're not, then I acknowledged that and say, Hey, it's

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okay to feel that way, but here's what we're going to do to move forward.

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Let's try the medication.

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Let's give it a month, two months.

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And if it doesn't feel like it's working, or if you're checking your numbers and

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it's not seeing me to do anything, then we'll make all these notations about it.

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And we'll start looking at other areas that we can, Check into, if it's,

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if the medication has seemed to be working, is it something in our diet?

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Is it something in, our sleep, I recognize that sleep was a big issue for why I

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wasn't seeing, the type of progress that I wanted to see, especially when

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it comes to working out, I will work out, but sleep was kind of a thing

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that was going to help me have the results that I want with working out.

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So.

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You have to kind of recognize what's the next best thing to do in terms of action.

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So that when you have that moment with yourself and you recognize what

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the fear is, and you just arm your critic and you say, Hey, I got you.

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You don't need to sound the alarm anymore.

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Trust me.

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Right.

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And then determine what's the next step.

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What is the best thing for me to do action wise in order to push past this fear?

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I think it is really important that the action piece is the

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finals, like bow on the end of it.

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Because if you break everything down, if you, recognize the alarm, you

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disarm it, you get to the root cause of it, but you don't do anything.

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Then you just kind of sit.

Taylor: 00:20:55

And it allows the cycle to repeat itself and you stay stuck.

Taylor: 00:20:59

I call it like research mode when I am really interested in something.

Taylor: 00:21:05

When I really want to.

Taylor: 00:21:08

See if I want to move forward in something, I do a lot of research.

Taylor: 00:21:12

I look at the equipment, I look at the, do I need to buy anything?

Taylor: 00:21:16

Will this require any additional skills?

Taylor: 00:21:18

What all would it take to do that?

Taylor: 00:21:20

And sometimes I get so wrapped up in all of the different options

Taylor: 00:21:26

that I never choose anything.

Taylor: 00:21:28

And then I never move forward.

Taylor: 00:21:30

And so I have to purposely push myself to take action.

Taylor: 00:21:35

I'll give you an example and then I'll shut up and let you guys go for the day.

Taylor: 00:21:40

But I have had an idea for a second show.

Taylor: 00:21:44

Completely unrelated to Helion and hindsight, completely something

Taylor: 00:21:47

that's a lot more personal to me.

Taylor: 00:21:50

And it would be a live show meaning no prerecorded stuff like you're

Taylor: 00:21:54

hearing right now just hit record and, it's live stream all these things.

Taylor: 00:22:01

And I've been stuck on making a decision about it because I

Taylor: 00:22:06

went down the rabbit hole of.

Taylor: 00:22:09

All the things.

Taylor: 00:22:10

Okay.

Taylor: 00:22:10

If I'm going to live stream, is my computer going to be able to handle that?

Taylor: 00:22:14

Do I have enough internet?

Taylor: 00:22:15

Do I have the right equipment?

Taylor: 00:22:17

Okay.

Taylor: 00:22:17

There's all these different live streaming services.

Taylor: 00:22:20

Do I do you know, and I'm on a Mac, do I, do you know,

Taylor: 00:22:23

Streamlabs do I do E cam live?

Taylor: 00:22:25

Do I do stream yard?

Taylor: 00:22:26

Do I really want to go browser-based again?

Taylor: 00:22:28

Do I want to have all these fancy overlays?

Taylor: 00:22:31

Oh, crap.

Taylor: 00:22:32

Well, if I need overlays.

Taylor: 00:22:33

Then I need it to be branded.

Taylor: 00:22:35

Do I need it to be branded?

Taylor: 00:22:36

Like I'm not even doing much right now.

Taylor: 00:22:37

Okay.

Taylor: 00:22:38

How many accounts am I willing to have it stream to?

Taylor: 00:22:40

Okay.

Taylor: 00:22:41

How much does it cost to have this pro version of this?

Taylor: 00:22:43

Do I need that?

Taylor: 00:22:44

Do you want you and I will go down the rabbit hole.

Taylor: 00:22:47

I'm on YouTube.

Taylor: 00:22:48

I'm looking at equipment.

Taylor: 00:22:49

I'm looking at, how much is this going to cost?

Taylor: 00:22:51

How much is that going to cost?

Taylor: 00:22:52

Where would I set up?

Taylor: 00:22:54

What about, this?

Taylor: 00:22:55

What about that?

Taylor: 00:22:56

And the reality is y'all already have everything that I need.

Taylor: 00:23:01

What I need to do.

Taylor: 00:23:02

And what I've been doing is I narrowed down three choices, three choices when

Taylor: 00:23:07

it comes to equipment any software that I need and whatever services,

Taylor: 00:23:13

that are, or platforms that I'm going to use to stream it from not going to

Taylor: 00:23:17

spend any money on overlays and fancy stuff, because I haven't done it yet.

Taylor: 00:23:21

And there's no point in me spending money on something that I don't need yet.

Taylor: 00:23:26

And canvas is real.

Taylor: 00:23:29

You can make anything at canvas.

Taylor: 00:23:31

So when it, when I put myself in those parameters, it pulls me out of research

Taylor: 00:23:37

mode into now here's your options.

Taylor: 00:23:40

I have, I have to force myself to narrow down those options.

Taylor: 00:23:44

And then I say, pick one.

Taylor: 00:23:46

And I might even get some weigh-ins.

Taylor: 00:23:48

I might even ask some friends who we've done streaming before, or,

Taylor: 00:23:51

look at reviews and stuff like that.

Taylor: 00:23:52

But at the end of the day, I have to pick one.

Taylor: 00:23:55

And then what do I do?

Taylor: 00:23:57

I set it up and our press go live.

Taylor: 00:24:00

So those are the hindsight thoughts for today.

Taylor: 00:24:04

I hope that this was beneficial and that you gained something from this.

Taylor: 00:24:10

And if you do share it with your friends, share with your family,

Taylor: 00:24:13

understand that your inner critic is something that is developed over time.

Taylor: 00:24:20

And it comes from the things that our family has said to us, our friends.

Taylor: 00:24:26

What we've heard in school, what we've heard at work navigating everyday life,

Taylor: 00:24:31

the things that we say to ourselves your inner critic is a combination

Taylor: 00:24:35

of all of these different things.

Taylor: 00:24:38

And it is really just this defense mechanism that is trying to warn

Taylor: 00:24:43

you of something, because whatever it is that you're about to do

Taylor: 00:24:46

is so unfathomable and so scary.

Taylor: 00:24:49

That your mind is, is not able to fully process that it's possible.

Taylor: 00:24:54

And what we have to do is consciously face that thing, bring it back to its nice,

Taylor: 00:25:00

beautiful lush garden, me Island self.

Taylor: 00:25:03

If I'm going with the marijuana reference and say, Hey, I'm going to return

Taylor: 00:25:08

this to you, which is your worries.

Taylor: 00:25:10

Doubts concerns, because I got this, but tell me what is it?

Taylor: 00:25:16

What's the root cause of this.

Taylor: 00:25:18

Why are you so up in arms about this?

Taylor: 00:25:21

And once we recognize that we take action to counteract that because

Taylor: 00:25:27

nobody wants to be stuck in their head.

Taylor: 00:25:29

Nobody wants to feel like no matter what you do, you cannot make progress

Taylor: 00:25:35

simply because you're talking yourself out of something all the time.

Taylor: 00:25:39

You just got to recognize it's something deeper that you're

Taylor: 00:25:41

trying to protect yourself from.

Taylor: 00:25:43

And once you recognize that.

Taylor: 00:25:45

Take action to prove yourself that it is going to be okay.

Taylor: 00:25:50

You're going to be okay.

Taylor: 00:25:52

You're going to be okay.

Taylor: 00:25:54

All right.

Taylor: 00:25:56

So let me know what you think.

Taylor: 00:25:59

Leave me a review.

Taylor: 00:26:00

Tell me what's on your mind.

Taylor: 00:26:02

Hit me up on Instagram.

Taylor: 00:26:03

Let me know.

Taylor: 00:26:04

Under the video, how you feel about your inner critic and ways

Taylor: 00:26:08

that you have navigated with those thoughts and worked with it.

Taylor: 00:26:13

Right.

Taylor: 00:26:14

I like to think of my inner critic now as this, I don't know if there were any

Taylor: 00:26:18

Naruto fans in the house, but basically my inner demon thing, if you will that

Taylor: 00:26:23

my body had to absorb to protect the rest of the world and now I can control it.

Taylor: 00:26:30

I would try to say the word jin, jinchuuriki

Taylor: 00:26:37

no, I probably Jack that up, but any of my anime fans out there, you know

Taylor: 00:26:41

what I'm talking about these special, spiritual beings that have to be

Taylor: 00:26:45

housed in the body and with that, you get some pretty cool powers too.

Taylor: 00:26:50

And so that's what I like to think of my inner critic adds to this

Taylor: 00:26:53

gorgeous, nine tailed Fox that went a little bit out of control.

Taylor: 00:26:59

And now we are in a partnership too.

Taylor: 00:27:03

Hey, you're my protection.

Taylor: 00:27:04

But at the same time, I am your master and you are going to listen to me in

Taylor: 00:27:09

a sense of not everything is about the sky falling instead, linear power.

Taylor: 00:27:15

So that way I can take this action and go into this scary thing and

Taylor: 00:27:19

show you that it's going to be okay.

Taylor: 00:27:22

Yeah.

Taylor: 00:27:23

Yeah.

Taylor: 00:27:24

So thank you guys once again for your time energy and for supporting the show.

Taylor: 00:27:30

And if there's anything that I can do to ensure that healing

Taylor: 00:27:35

and hindsight is providing the information that you need, let me know.

Taylor: 00:27:39

And if you'd like to support the show, you can definitely

Taylor: 00:27:41

hit me up on buy me a coffee.

Taylor: 00:27:44

There is a link on the player somewhere, somewhere.

Taylor: 00:27:49

I don't know where it is, but somewhere where you can help fuel my love for

Taylor: 00:27:54

tea, coffee, and all hot drinks, and it would be greatly appreciated.

Taylor: 00:27:59

So that's all I got this week.

Taylor: 00:28:03

We have great guests coming up.

Taylor: 00:28:04

I'm really excited for you guys to listen to this episode.

Taylor: 00:28:08

It's going to be with the lovely ladies of the dope shit.

Taylor: 00:28:11

My therapist says podcast.

Taylor: 00:28:13

I think you're going to enjoy it, but until then, I'll catch you guys next time.